Roses For My Lady

My husband and I refer to this month as Lovers Month. For this is the month (12th) six years ago that Mark asked me to marry him.
We celebrate this month because this is when our marriage really began. It was this time that we made convenat, sealing it under the Huppah that June.

For us it is a big deal. I decorate the house for the month, have a special meal and the past few years we have even got away for a lover's weekend.
Last year, we headed out for the Beach. Mark was home for R&R, so it was a precious time.
This year, I rejoice my hubby is home.
This year, after Hebrew class Sunday evening, we took off for Williamsburge, enjoying this special celebration.
One of the times I have always loved about Mark is that whether he is home or deployed, he workes to keep the passion, the romance going. Not to stay I don't. We work to keep the love going.
Last year, while Mark was coming home, I went shopping and found V-Day decorations at half and even ninty percent off. Including hearts and flowers wrapping paper that I covered our bedroom door with.
It has remain u.
A truly loving marriage is a romantic one. We would shower the one we love with love, not just the 14th of Feb, but every day of our lives.
Tonight as my husband takes his shower, I am so thankful he is home this year, to share this special time.
I don't take it, or him for granted.

The Joy of Shabbat

Yes, I know it has been a few months since I have written.
Life has come to a slow pace, a peaceful place.
Mark is still home and no deployments are in sight for the next few months.
The exciting news is we will have a soon a Civil Affairs unit stand up at a nearby base. Exciting because the base is only forty-five minutes from home instead of four-six hours. It means my support when he deploy will be right here.
Of course this means Mark's beard will have to go.
And it is now so nice and full.
But I am not thinking about that right now.
I am thining about the chuck roast in the oven, smelling good. I am thinking about how nice Mark will look in his Shabbat clothes.
The lighting of the candles, the sparkle of the wine and the scent of challah. The blessings. The time with the Holy One and with my beloved.
I think of the torah being chanted and the discussions afterwards.
I think of the peace that fills our home and pray for that peace to fill other homes, other hearts, even for the people of Egypt.
The joy of Shabbat.
There is nothing like it.

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Mark's battle with depression.

It's a Reel Thing: A Christmas Carol Revisited

It's a Reel Thing: A Christmas Carol Revisited
From time to time I like to read older post. I like to see how much I have grown over the years, becoming what rabbi mark Gulon calls a lovely human being. This is one of my favorites and fitting for the season.

Home For Hanukkah

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It was so nice to have the hubby home for Hanukkah. With all that we went through this year, Mark and I decided to keep it lowkey. But we did get together with friends one evening and of course enjoyed the sights and sounds of the Festival of Lights.

It Ain't Easy: But Worth It

We who are the sons and daughters of Abrahma know how different our life is.
I have no problem with being amoung "the chosen people." We have been chosen to bring Torah to the world. We women light the Shabbat candles once a week, light that shines from Shabbat to Shabbat. And whether you believe in a real, personal Messiah (like we do) a Messianc Age, that he has come or will come, it is from the loins of the hebrew people he shall come.
It is an easy life. Everything in our lives, from clothing to food reminds us that we have the Name of the Creator upon us. That we are called to live a life that is shines like the menorah that once stood in the temple, shining forth a light that draws all men and women to G-d. I cover my head to keep my beauty for my husband alone. Mark the kippah becuase he is under the submission of G-d. How often Mark and I are seen as the "jews first" and then Mark and Laini.
This is true even in the army. 
How often we hear, "how can you be  jewish and in the army." "isn't Mark being in the army against Torah?"
 I often find that wheen people hear the word “military”, they automatically think of  cool umiforms, guns, jeeps, warships and bombs. They think of airports with men and women dressed in greens and blues heading for home or another deployment. 
Or they think of the technology that continues to makes our military the superior force in the world, of what seems to be an never ending war in a land that is stuck in the Stone Age.
As Mrs. Major, I hear this all the time.
 What I also often see is that people overlook, that undereath the cool umiform are real flesh and blood people who are leaving loved ones and praying that they return home safe. They forget there are family and friends praying for their loved ones far from the supper table. They forget that they want to be a force of change. That with the guns, tanks, jeeps and bombs, but also stuffed animals, clear water and building schools. That many carry with them into the warzone their faith That faith is one of the common threads that unites us not only as a nation, but remains one of our strongest military assets.

They forget that when these servicemen and women are off duty, many head for places set aside for worship. And for some, those place are also their sleeping quarters.
While all faiths are welcome in the armed services and many do, it is hard to practice one's faith in the mililarty. And for some of us, it is harder than others.
When you think of soldiers, sailors, airmen and marines of faith, jewish isn't the first faith that comes to mind. During this time, our thoughts turn to getting Christmas gifts and cards to servicemen and women.
Not Hanukkah.
I remember taking Mark to the airport when his R&R was over last Feburay and an older gentleman stopped us to thank both of us for our service. Spotting Mark's kippah, he asked if it was hard to be jewish and in the army. Mark said sometimes, but he makes it work. He says he craves out the time he needs to pray, to study torah and keep Shabbat the best he can. Sometimes he is the only Jew in his unit and sometimes there are a few jewish soldiers.
The man nodden and noted that with Mark's size, few would mess with him.
So true.

Even from the birth of this nation, the jewish people have had a hand not only in the building of America, but also serving and protecting her.
We are commanded to be protectors of life. Not to sit back and allow others to attack us and not fight back. When our home, family the inoccent are threaten, Torah commands we stand up and protect ourselves, our loved ones, our homes. And therefor it is right and proper for those who chose to, to join the mililarty and service their nation.
But it ain't.
I hate that last week before he leaves, when I have to face seeing Mark's thick and lush beard shaved off. Packing extra Tzit Tzit and Shabbat candles.
If there are other jews in the unit, Mark shares Ere Shabbat and other holy days with them. If there are none, and most of the time there are not, he calls me, we light the candles together, and then he goes to his room to keep Shabbat the best he can.
It ain't easy, but its worth it. For while hard, it is a challenge that we chose to meet.
Just as we do in every area of our lives. Just as there are times when we are to past on a dish because it isn't kosher, Mark has to be just as picky when on post. Just as we take care of what we read, watch and the company we keep, so too, Mark has to do the same when deployed.
For in having to find created ways to practice our faith, it becomes something precious and more dear.
Hmmm, sounds like a jewish marriage.

It's been Four Months????

I can't believe it has actually been four months since I have written in this blog!
But then, it has been a crazy four months.
Right after mark was placed in the Woulded Warrior program, we learned a friend almost died. It seems he hadn't been taking care of himself (very high blood sugar) and found himself in hosptial. He lost a small part of his right toe. He lived alone and no one to care for him when he went home. So Mark and I talked about it and he came to live with us.
What we thought would be three weeks, turned into almost four months. It is always hard having another person in your home. And our apartment isn't that big.
But our friend fully recovered, coming along further and faster than anyone had expected and now back in his home, thankful for the second chance he has been given.
But it was hard. As believers in G-d, we know it was the right thing to do. But it was hard on us, for this our time. Little help came from his church. A few people helped with meals or taking him over the weekends, etc. This was Mark's leave and we really had to work through the feeling that time was thrown away.
We know that G-d shall bless us. He has blessed us.
 During this time, with the delay of Mark's homecoming, illness, family drama, Mark's depression, our marriage took a hit. There was a point where someone even tried to take advange of the tension and  tried to inbetween us.
It was a nice try, but no go.
So last week, for Thanksgiving, Mark and I went away to Colonial Williamsburg to celebrate and to reconnect. We truly love each other, but we had to knock down the wall that was beginning to build between us.
It takes work to have a great marriage. Like the tending of a garden, one needs to keep watch of the weeds and bugs. Sometimes there is reseeding, pruning. That way you can enjoy the beauty all year round.
So we enjoyed five amazing days in Williamburg and now getting ready for Hanukkah.
Last year, i was sending Hanukkah to Afghantisan.
This year, my soldier is home.